OK. Here are my experiences, so far….
1- Understanding the other people’s view and where they are coming from and respect their decision.
In earlier episodes, Abraham Lincoln was very upset to his general for not complying with his request to attack the Southern Army during the Civil War. Southern Army was surrounded and backed up to a raging river. Final blow by the Northern Army would end the war and stop further casualties but the General did not attack causing the Southern army escape and lengthen the war. Mr. Lincoln’s first reaction was anger than he realized that there could be many reasons why his general decided not to carry out his instructions which were possibly unknown to Mr. Lincoln at that time. He realized that criticizing the general would make him feel better but would not improve the relationship with him.
I do have tendency to go with what I think is correct at my work. My profession, accounting and taxation, is strictly regulated and non-compliance may result in substantial financial impact for my clients. Workings with rules probably effect my decisions at work and I carry them into my social life. After reading the above-mentioned section of the book, I realized this flaw of mine and now trying to understand the other party’s point of view, their expectation. I used to constantly criticize a very close friend of mine with his decisions and his indecisiveness about work. Although he was extremely hard working person, he was not able to settle in one field and kept changing occupations. On our next gathering, I approached him and apologized for all the criticism I made before. I included that I did that because I wanted him to succeed. He told me that he knew my intensions and he was not really upset. He was changing the jobs because he really did not need the money but wanted to find a job that he was happy doing it.
2- Since my sister-in-law works, my mother-in-law spends most of her time with her kids. She always complains that they are not eating properly or enough, doing things that she has forbidden to do etc. Moreover, when we are at a restaurant and even the kid’s parents are around, she still involves with the kids from their eating, sitting on the chair, playing with their toys and so on. Which causes constant disturbance around and we can not enjoy our meal. I decided that one day, I will read the book to her about dealing with the kids and the ways she can make them do whatever she wants them to do without fighting with them.
3- My dog – My best friend.
One of the chapters of the book is about genuine interest in others. If you show genuine interest to others, those people will remember you, be friendlier, helpful, and respectful towards you. Author says the dog is one of few animals that without providing any benefit like a chicken or a cow, cherished by many people. The reason is they show unconditional love, and interest towards their owners. I grow up in a small town surrounded by farm animals and yes..Chicken. I was not too interested in any of those animals. When we moved to the United States, my sister bought a German Sheppard puppy. At that time, I was learning English at ESL (English as second language) classes. One of my assignments was to read a book. I found this book about “How to Train Dogs”. I figured, since we have a puppy, I can read the book, learn English and be able to teach a couple of tricks to the puppy. Eventually the dog and I became very good friends. We walked together, played together, and drove to Manhattan Beach on Sundays to share a large pepperoni pizza at the pier and watched the sunset. When I heard about the dog and their unconditional love and genuine interest in you, I reminiscent about these memories. Those qualities made my dog very important to me and the feeling was mutual.
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